How I Work At Home With My Baby. Frugalwoods fam selfie. Before Babywoods was born, everyone and their mother warned me that my life would never be the same. According to these doomsdayers, after I had a baby I would lose all of my time, money, hair, and sanity. And I’ll be honest here, they weren’t entirely wrong on that last one.
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But what Mr. Frugalwoods and I have found over this past year and a half is that parenting is far less dire than pregnancy scare- mongering led us to believe. We are still very much the same people with very much the same interests, resources, and faculties–just with the addition of a wonderfully talkative, bubbly, active toddler. Yes life is immensely different, yes it is harder (though funnier) to fly on an airplane, yes there is avocado in my hair right now–but despite all this, we didn’t subsume our former selves into parenting. Rather, we’ve layered parenting on top of, and in addition to, our lives.
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What we’ve discovered is that parenting doesn’t need to occur to the exclusion of everything else. Parenting Myth #2: I Will Have No Free Time. Ever. I’ve already debunked parenting myth #1 “babies are expensive” in the following: Today I want to address that other, arguably even more precious resource: time.
Since achieving financial independence was all about enabling us to pursue our passions, it was paramount to Mr. FW and me to find a tenable approach to parenting that fulfills both us and our daughter.
In summary: it is 1. Hi-Def Quality As Good As You (2017). How, you wonder? I’m so glad you asked because I’ve written a veritable tome on the topic today. The example I use throughout this post is working/homesteading, because that’s my experience, but the tenets are applicable to any stay- at- home parent who wishes they had more time to devote to personal projects such as crafting, gardening, exercise, cooking, meditation, reading, etc.
All Shows High quality streaming links to the most popular tvshows minutes after they air! Before Babywoods was born, everyone and their mother warned me that my life would never be the same. According to these doomsdayers, after I had a baby I would lose.
Our Unusual Childcare Choice. The black and white dilemma modern parents have grappled with for decades is to either: 1) have one parent leave the workforce to stay home with the child(ren), or 2) pay often exorbitant prices for the child(ren) to go to daycare/hire a nanny. I bribe Babywoods with faux flowers so that I can photograph her in her church clothes every Sunday. Some families are fortunate to have free (or drastically reduced) childcare provided by grandparents or other extended family members, but most often, parents assume they’ll have to choose between door #1 and door #2. The challenge with this is that frequently, neither parent wants to absent themselves from the workforce for reasons of their longterm career trajectory, the fulfillment they derive from their job, and/or financial imperatives. However, they’re then on the hook for spending what can amount to the totality of one parent’s entire salary on daycare.
I am here to say that there’s a third door. A less well- known door, a less well- traveled door, and one that’s a bit unusual. But it works. And that door is. Sounds impossible and some days, it is.
But thanks to the internet and the rise in careers that can be conducted from home, the ability to work while child- rearing is–or could be–a reality for many families. I take this unorthodox third way in all of my financial decisions and I knew childcare would be no different. Frugalwoods and I eschew conventional wisdom on how much things should cost, or how little you should save, or how difficult it is to become financially independent, we also eschew the standard limitations our culture imposes on working vs. I say, do both if you want.
The Caveats On Privilege. Hard to believe this was only a little over a year ago! Of course no post on parenting is complete without a set of caveats. First, I want to recognize that Mr. FW and I are tremendously fortunate to be able to structure our work from home as we do.
Not everyone has this option and I fully realize how privileged we are. Additionally, we work because we enjoy what we do–not because we need the money. This is the extraordinary privilege of financial independence. As longtime readers know, my husband and I didn’t inherit money or come into lottery winnings; rather, we saved extraordinarily high percentages of our salaries for years and invested in a revenue- generating rental property and, more importantly, the stock market.
If you’d like to initiate your own extreme frugality regimen, take my free Uber Frugal Month Challenge. On Parenting. My parenting philosophy is that everyone should do what works for them. Every family is different and every kid is different. Only you know what’s best given your circumstances. I share stories of how we parent–just as I share stories of how we manage our money–to offer insight into our alternative approach to life. I am not a parenting expert (not by a very, very long shot, which is why this post includes links to parenting books I’ve found useful). I don’t seek to condemn other ways of life.
Relevant to this conversation, I have no animus towards those who choose to be full- time stay- at- home parents or full- time working- outside- of- the- home parents or any configuration therein. There is no right or wrong here, merely a diversity of ideas on how to raise the next generation of young citizens. As with everything else we discuss here on Frugalwoods, my opinions are borne of personal experience and are but one option in the plethora of lifestyle options. We don’t do budget shaming here and we certainly don’t do mommy wars. The Nature Of Our Work.
Our first family photo, taken by the nurses in the NICULet me explain what exactly it is that we do. FW works full- time from home for a traditional organization, which means he works regular business hours. Conversely, I work exclusively for myself and as a freelancer, which means I have no boss (except myself!).
Hence, my schedule is 1. We chose this schedule because I wanted to quit my 9- to- 5 and be the primary caregiver. While this might, at first blush, appear to conform to traditional gender roles, I assure you nothing about our relationship is conservative or regressive. FW and I are both feminists committed to an egalitarian partnership and it was my express desire to transition into this role.
Since Mr. FW works from home and thus has no commute, he’s able to do the heavy childcare lifting in the mornings and evenings, which frees me up to write or get other chores done (or sometimes go into my office, close the door, and do yoga while listening to him read “Barnyard Dance” to Babywoods in the next room). This is not a typical arrangement and I don’t pretend that everyone can finagle this with their employer, their skill set, or their career. However, an increasing number of employers are allowing employees to work remotely and there’s a burgeoning class of jobs one can freelance or side hustle or whatever you want to call working for yourself in an entrepreneurial capacity. I also want to note that I built up my freelance work prior to staying home with Babywoods, which made the transition easier. Buy Marie Curie (2017) Movie Online here. However, you could also do so after welcoming a child into your family. If you’re interested in working as a freelance writer like I do, and aren’t sure where to start, I recommend my friend Catherine Alford’s course: Get Paid To Write For Blogs. Sidenote: please, please, please do not get yourself into a multi- level marketing scam of a situation in an attempt to work from home.
Don’t buy products that you will then have to sell because you are tremendously unlikely to make any money from this. For more information, here’s an entire website devoted to exposing the scams inherent to these types of organizations. This Too Will Change. She’s a lot bigger now! Every month–nay, every week–with a baby is different and our schedule as a family has altered many times in the 1. Babywoods’ birth.
What worked when she was an infant doesn’t work now that she’s a walking toddler and I’m certain what we do now won’t work when she’s in pre- school and kindergarten. We adapt to her needs, her developmental stage, and her schedule.